ho there

hi!
we've been planning and shopping and cleaning all week for a party we're having on Sunday (tomorrow) - a pirate party!!!, yay!!... and then Monday we have dh's work party, and Tuesday we're leaving for a cabin in the woods for a few days - it could be a while before I post!
Just wanted you to know.
might not see you til we get back.

News Hour with Jim Lehrer

It's 7:43pm.
Tuesday night.
Jim Lehrer's on.
Theyre talking about/interviewing/debating politics, candidates, issues, and the like.
Of course.

I would like to take this moment to say (just in case I am not properly thankful in every moment of my life)-

Thank You God.
That even though we are a one income family, we are not only surviving, but thriving.

Thank you, Goddess Mother, that we own our home, and are not in danger of losing it.

Thank you, Supreme Being, for the pluck that allows us to brazenly and assuredly Go Forth.

Even though we've the highest (or very nearly so) gasoline prices in our country ($4+ still)- we are able to get to work (bike), trek, and adventure as we see fit.
Not that we are disrespectful and disdainful of our peers' suffering - just that we are feeling hale, happy, fit, and free from oppression.

And not that we are a wealthy family, and are not a bit late on this, that, and the other from time to time.
But we're alive.
We're healthy.
We're not living in fear.

It is absolutely not my intention to point out how special or deserved we are.

But I feel Blessed - and would like to acknowledge my Gratitude sincerely and deeply.

We're not any more worthy than anyone else.
We haven't done things exactly right, or safe.
Eric and I aren't the most adult, responsible people alive.

But we are blessed.

Thank You.
Thank You.
Thank You.

Blessings and Love to all.

sacred life sunday: Sprite

Here's a perscription for your enjoyment.

sprite
1. Air set in motion by breathing; breath; hence, sometimes, life itself. [Obs.] "All of spirit would deprive." --Spenser.

Totally dunk yourself in the pool. (It doesn't matter if it's of the seven f00t or of the one foot variety.)
While completely saturated, at around 5:13pm or so, grab the flowing hose, face the sun, and plug your thumb into the end of it so that it sprays straight up and rains down onto you and the children-
Sun shines between you and it-
sending reflections,
sunlight,
sparkles,
and Magic all around.
Kick your feet for more splashes if'n' you wanna.
Make sure you specially note all shouts of jubilation and laughter.

circle in

one of my (isn't it nice how we can use "no caps" as a way to express a mood?) things on my 103 Things list is to form a circle, one of sisterhood. the grrrls.

i think i'm ready to get serious about it.
my intentions and bends of mind fluctuate with the times. as does all of life, i suppose.
sometimes i put particular things away for months at a time. and then a friend asks something like "have you done anything of a magical nature, lately?" and i reply "no... but this time of year is always when i get serious about it again." how can a girl start to gather herbs and watch pumpkins grow, and not have visions of herb craft? (even if she somehow forgot to plant pumpkins this year?)
i think that we have such a natural communion with nature in the summer - we spend much of our time outdoors, we come inside smelling of tomato leaves and earth, and scents of summer and sun are constantly wafting as the children dash by.
we live it so fully that making a formal commitment to Be with nature just seems... unnecessary.

so it's now starting to be That Time again.
seed gathering. cutting for drying. the nights are starting to get a bit cooler. the sun disappears much earlier. and now the next moons will bear the names of "Harvest Moon" and "Blood Moon". as surprising as it is, even in the neighborhood the very first signs of autumn have begun. the fruit is falling to the ground. in the middle of the night i hear the rustle as pears fall, sweeping the lower leaves with a long swoosh, and hear the inevitable thump as they hit the ground. we even have a couple of branches in the neighborhood that have begun to fade into yellow.

it has begun.

remembering my friend's question, i start to ruminate over the way of things.

yes. a circle.

what is it that i need or desire?
what, exactly, do i envision?

Magic, i think. or Magick, if you please.
a solid Circle of empowered and empowering Energy.
a solid Circle of Girls creating, materializing, envisioning, intending, manifesting, purifying, rejoicing, embracing, and internalizing.
following no formal laws that don't suit us. (except for Harm None, of course.)
sometimes quiet and contemplative when the Sisterhood needs it.
sometimes loud, cackling, and drunken :) when we need that.
sometimes a blessing of a child, sometimes blessings poured on the head and heart of a Mama. Sometimes a prayer, sometimes a Universal Request. sometimes demanding, sometimes reverent.
i have visions of being empowered by a Release when celebrating just before a New Moon, and Culmination right before a Full one.
I envision BlessingWays, and love spells.
I envision sending an antagonist Love, Respect, and Peace when one is feeling particularly threatened by him or her.
I envision honoring the God and Goddess Within, and knowing that we are never Without.

I don't expect this Circle to be formed by the people in my life today, necessarily. though it may be, of course.
but i envision it to be formed by women who Need it. women who understand what it can be, who are willing to let others serve them, and offer their aid to a Sister in need.

it doesn't take much, of course.
all it requires is to know that though the world would have us believe (so it appears, most times) that alone we can do nothing; we will always reiterate, rejuvenate, and remind that together, the Circle of Together is Power, and we can... and do.

a pirate looks at forty

sometimes i struggle a bit.
with being a pirate.

'cause, you know... i don't believe in violence.
but i do love a confrontational Stand. (even if i'm all alone.)

and i don't believe in pillaging.
but i'm not particularly lawful.

i love Buddha and Ghandi, and seek to emulate them (regardless of how it may appear).
but i have a soft spot for gentle outlaws, rough riders, and bratty people.

i would never steal from the blind.
but i'd probably (ahem) pilfer from the rich and share the spoils.

sometimes i think and feel like Linus, "I love mankind. It's people I can't stand."
but most days i want to save my whole Human Race.

sometimes i want to excuse myself, even from friendships, and to say "to hell with everyone."
and then instead i'll turn around and meditate on sending those same damned folks Love.

i want to be master of my life, and i want -and intend- to walk on water.
but i make no apologies for my irreverent (and possibly offending) choices in this life. and there are many.

i have lots of things i attribute it to.
myself, namely. (i like to think this contrariness is a part of my eternal nature.)
my Papa (pronounced Pah-paw). who called all the grandbabes "scaliwags".
my Grandma -his wife- who was a women's right activist almost before there was such a thing (excluding suffragists).

sidenote (added 8/28/2008): I did not mean activist, so much as living example. She was a woman working in a man's world - in a top position - for many, many years. I remember that her retirement was mentioned in the newspaper when I was a child, because it took a long time for them to find a replacement for her position.)

my Daddy, who rode bikes, taught me to ride one -a yamaha 120 suzuki 125 at age 10 or so-, and had a yellow Chopper [swoon] in our garage beginning in the late seventies. and regularly treated me to Cosby, Steals, Nash, and Young. and Cat Stephens. and Poco. and Three Dog Night. and Fleetwood Mac. and Bob Dylan. especially on sunday mornings while he cooked breakfast.
my Uncle Dean, (Daddy's brother), who is/was a pot smokin, beer drinkin, livin in the tropics beach bum, with kind brown eyes and sun bronzed skin. he sails on his two man sailboat with the dolphins. and collects sharks teeth from the early morning beach. swoon again.
a girlfriend who had real hippies for parents - young, blonde, and full of b-52's and fuzzy navels. and Corona's. they in the mid eightis also had a friend that we (my young friend and i) adored - he can only be called a real iranian guru. Imahn, was his name.

love all around.
contrariness all around.
screw 'ems, all around.



Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Wanted to sail upon your waters since I was three feet tall
You've seen it all, you've seen it all

Watched the men who rode you switch from sails to steam
And in your belly you hold the treasures few have ever seen
Most of em dream, most of em dream

Yes I am a pirate, two hundred years too late
The cannons don't thunder, theres nothin to plunder
I'm an over-forty victim of fate
Arriving too late, arriving too late

I've done a bit of smugglin, I've run my share of grass
I made enough money to buy miami, but I pissed it away so fast
Never meant to last, never meant to last

And I have been drunk now for over two weeks
I passed out and I rallied and I sprung a few leaks
But I got stop wishin, got to go fishin
Down to rock bottom again
Just a few friends, just a few friends

(instrumental)

I go for younger women, lived with several awhile
Though I ran em away, they'd come back one day
Still could manage to smile
Just takes a while, just takes a while

Mother, mother ocean, after all the years I've found
My occupational hazard being my occupations just not around
I feel like I've drowned, gonna head uptown

Coda:
I feel like I've drowned, gonna head uptown

Jimmy Buffet, written in 1974


my mother is my only friend who has passed this big mile marker. (when did i sign up to be the oldest?)
i'm not stressing it too much, considering.

it's funny how no matter how much wisdom we have at six, seventeen (and some of us do), or twenty-seven, or thirty-three... something new happens to you when you're imminently facing forty, I think.

these moments of mine are coming more and more often of late.
i fancy it comes from being a pirate looking at forty.

1968

1968, Tom Brokaw

"we felt that our government was lying to us..."

"how many more men? how many more lives? a government that tells us we are close to the end of the war..." ted kennedy

moving consciousness

arlo guthrie says "we just wanted a simple life..."

"how many roads must a man walk down... before you call him a man?"

government talks about the need for "unity".

it's said on the evening news that landing on the moon is a successful, unifying event in a year when humanity has done nothing to be very proud of.

school children believed that leaders did not ever die of old age. that they were always assassinated.

the silent majority is born.


into october of this year i was born.
i'd have to say that i come by it "natural".
and i am grateful for it.

Statements

Be warned this post is not for the faint of heart. Or the faint of Religious Faith, for that matter. Those feeling in a serious mood should move on.
You've been warned!

So.
We (Eric and I) are not bumper sticker sort of people.
Not that we don't admire some of them.
And not [choke] that we have nothing to say. [rolls eyes] puh-lease, she mutters, making fun of herself.

It's just one of those things.
Like a tatt.
Once you do it, you're committed.
And once you Do It, one is never never enough.

So we've refrained.

My friend Julie tempted me sorely a couple of months? ago, by buying a couple from the Natural Child Project.
But No.

In comes crash.
Beloved Dear Truck is totalled. (Says insurance, and more importantly, Trusted Mechanic.)

Find new car.
Nissan or 4Runner. (we're a fan of the Japanese suv's.) Whichever One says "I want to be a part of your family!!"

Nissan it is, then.
New Dear Truck boasts a couple of decorations from Germany, the Netherlands, and Austria. Very Cool, and matches burly ski/bike/luggage rack quite nicely.
But... we've never been to Germany.

Well, then.
Now's the time!

License plate frame.
and
And another statement...
Because I believe it with everything that I am.

And oh, another one....Because, you know, chances are, it's True...

Er... and another that says "Love to learn forever.... Unschool!"

And just One More (for Mama)...It appears that I am making up for lost time. (Not that all will necessarily make it to Dear Truck's backside.)

Dh has long wanted a Jesus Fish.
(Most of you should skip the rest of this post.)
Not a typical one, however.
Or even the Darwin one.
No, the one he wants says Satan.
!!
Gah.
Not because dh is a Satanist.
No... he's an Atheist. (and irreverently laughs at the whole idea.)
But he fancies himself (as do I) very Punk Rock.
And (unlike me -- I have no such Glorious Aspirations) a Rock Star.
(though while true, this story is also a poke at dh. We'll see if it compels him to submit a comment at last.)

"Since you're putting all those stickers on.... I want a Satan fish."
sigh.
I remember well Beverly's commentary on Fish. (and strive to practice embracing diversity myself.)
"Okay." I agree.

I look online for said Fish.
At first I didn't see one....

But, equally good,
I did find this.....



[choke and sputter]
I think it will do.
ahem.
Our friends will be able to find our New Truck, now.

a thousand things

i had a thousand things to do today


i chose slow and easy instead.


namely, puttering around my beloved pond.


...my sacred space.