Saturday, April 21, 2007

The In Between

This is my transition post, where I'll say

For ten minutes while I've been getting the babe ready for bed (britches changed and jammies) I've been incapable of any speech at all, I'm so devastated. I'm not crying, though I was at first.
I'm dumbfounded.
In shock.
May seem over dramatic to you, but this last entry was really important to me.

Other thoughts:
She did it yesterday, too.
The trouble with being a writer such as myself is that you learn as you write, and go more inside yourself as you write, and recapturing the thought after the moment of feeling it smacks of pretention and phoniness.

Another thought: Yesterday I was perhaps thinking "this is trying to tell me something", maybe too much on the pc, or something like that. Tonight, no way. I've been on and off this chair many times, being careful to attend to all the needs of my children. Thinking and pondering as I was tending to them, reporting back here when I had figured something out. Last night Eric was home to aid them. Tonight it's just me. Don't want to neglect them.

I think that's it. Had to get all that out.

Moving on to "The Good News".....
My post, should I dare to try again, will be much less arrogant than it was, no doubt I'll be feeling much more humble than I was two hours ago. (Yes, I've been writing for over two hours.)

hanging head very low... trying to find the courage to go at it with a different attitude....


Melissia said...

I'm sorry sweetie. Maybe your truth was evolving as you wrote and the universe helped you revise :)

Stephanie said...

I knew it was a friend when I saw the mail thing.
True, enough. Maybe it's the truth without all the spice (arrogance) that I should be after.
Love to you, Steph