Friday, July 13, 2007

Communication Problems

Oh I have certainly been neglectful of this blog.
I have certainly been neglectful of this aspect of my life, too.
My camera died, as you know. Then my desktop. Leaving me to wonder what it meant that I had these two major things cut from my life.
Then yesterday my notebook (brand new) took a nosedive. After spending a while with tech support, to no good end, they are shipping me a box to send little laptop back to them for repairs.
This morning it decided to work again, after a while.
Not sure why physically.
And still not sure why spiritually.

I have considered that it might be a price I'm having to pay for a bit of piracy.

I've considered that it's repercussions because I've used the words "I" and "writer" in the same sentence. Or even in the same chapter. (I've seen lately how utterly bereft of wit or of an interesting expression of thought I am.)

I've considered that I ought perhaps to put the memories inside my head instead of freezing the moment in words. That maybe I am too eager to let the moment just lived reside in the past, making room in my head and heart for the next moment's magic.
Maybe I am abandoning the last moment too soon, filing it away before I am learning from it.

Maybe I'm writing to please -placate- too many others. Any others.

Maybe I've been steamrolling over the more delicate things (people, requirements, subtleties) in my life lately. Maybe I've been just a bit too coarse.

Maybe I've just been a really poor communicator. And I need to pay attention.

Provided I arrive at any conclusions, and I get the opportunity to do so, I'll let you know what comes of it.


whimsigal said...

You ARE a writer. Who's to say you're not learning from the moments as you write about them? You can always go back and add things as you think of them. Doesn't change the essence of you, the writer.

Remember on my blog I mentioned the disk camera? See if this jogs your memory:

Laura said...

Whatchew talkin'bout grrrl.... from what little I've read I can already see that writing is your medium, your palette, your method for dissection and learning and sharing. This post seems to have been written in a moment of self-doubt, but reading your latest post you'll see it's already come full circle - where angst led to realization which led to action! I hope your writing isn't to placate others but to help you wriggle out the wheat from the chaff, and I believe we all benefit from getting in on the process. Write on, grrrl, write on! It's good stuff.