Thursday, February 14, 2008

surviving

I've made such a fuss about pmsing and my emotions that I thought I'd update.
The thing is - I know that there is away to fix it. I know that I can heal (or balance) any crazy fluctuations... I'm just not sure how.
And, of course, part of the problem is that when I'm in a serious bout of it, sometimes I don't even care. It's all I can do to just survive the moment. I think the first step is to change that, then maybe I can move on to "I choose peace instead of this," as I mentioned before.

Today was wonderful!
Though I have not spent any time at all with my Valentine - well my main one, anyway.
The babes and I headed out early to meet friends, and Eric scooted off to work shortly after that. He won't be home 'til probably long after we're tucked in and nestled like spoons.

But, we did get to pass the day with friends -The Mama's with additions, and it was a lovely afternoon.
No stress, no panicking.
I spent quite a bit of time downstairs this morning before we left, first blending some oils together that I thought would be helpful in less than tranquil moments, and then an uninterrupted and loooong meditation.

Now I'm here (with quiet music on my ipod), Maddie is sleeping peacefully, and Trev is watching a movie and giggling. (I can hear him, I always listen to my stuff quietly.)
The house is quiet except for his laughter, it's still and winter-white outside, so the world without and the world within - indeed, even within myself - are quiet, and peaceful, and still.

I welcome it, and am thankful.

6 comments:

Life With Us said...

I am glad you had a good day. For years I have suffered form Season Affective disorder and I did finally this year resort to meds. I am really amazed at the difference and I will go off of them come April. I don't know if that is what you are going through but reading a lot of positive quotes and stories also has helped and listen to music always soothes me.
Danette

Lerend Zonder School said...

It was wonderful yesterday wasn't it? I'm so glad you guys were able to come:)

piscesgrrl said...

Listen, I have no idea if this will be helpful to you in any way, but I had mood swings that were so awful, and hormonal shifts too, that I did a lot of research and came to the conclusion that I had a hormone imbalance. I went to 3+ doctors who offered me prozac, but I knew while that might help, it wouldn't *solve* the problem. After a breast lump scare, then a "hey, let's just lop her breast off" scare, I finally found a holistic MD who does *thermograms* - which test the heat variances in your tissues. One look at my pictures and he said, "My... oh my... you, my dear, have a HUGE hormone imbalance." Ya, I almost kissed him. For 4+ years now he's been treating me holistically which includes using a natural progesterone cream he has made at a lab to his specifications (the OTC stuff isn't usually pure), diet, and DHEA. I'm telling you, he saved my life - well, our emotional life anyhow.

I was all estrogen. My last thermogram (Monday) showed I was just about back to the balance I need.

Just a thought - because I realized, after years of **working like crazy** on being mindful, calming myself, making better choices, the fact was, so much of it was really like pushing a boulder up a hill with my hormones all a'whack like that. I'm a new person. It's hard to override it emotionally when the physical is working against you.

Something to consider. If you search for thermogram practitioners, you may find someone near you.

xxoo
L (the queen of windy comments)

Stephanie S. said...

I'm pretty sure that I do.
At least - I would be shocked and absolutely dismayed if I didn't! :)

I'm gonna check into some women's stuff at Wild Oats today (um, it's changing to Whole Foods, I thnk) and see wht they have for me.

There is a family practitioner that also happens to be a homeopath that I'd like to be our family Doc, I think it's probably time for us to line up and meet him, too.

Loves, Steph. (who doesn't appreciate :) being dethroned from the Queen of wordy words.)

Aubrey said...

so glad you are finding some balance. it sounds like you are doing much more than simply surviving. you are thriving, brilliantly.

singingfamily said...

I have a day like yours somewhere in my blog recently (in fact I think you may have commented on it:) I suffer from huge shifts in moods at times and with children, ugh, well you know. I have found at times what has worked has been going to see someone (a friend, a family member or yes a really great dynamic and non diagnosy therapist. These things have helped me. I know from my work that often times medication can just make things so much worse. It's a struggle though but you know what, the older I get and the more mindful I am, the better everything is for me.
I am full of compassion today for my family and friends, for those strangers but mostly for myself.
Kelli